I May Have Been Mistaken About the Submission Not Being On

You will note how my arm currently does this, when it was not previously able to do this at all.

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It has recently come to my attention that I may have been mistaken about the extent to which that armbar was on. While I was of the understanding that the submission was in no way there, I now have reason to believe that the move may in fact have been staggeringly there, after all. While I was initially confident in my assessment due to my elbow placement, recent evidence such as the newly added joint in my forearm and extreme, radiating pain surging through my nervous system leads me to believe I may have misread the situation.

I have heard reports attributing my decision to not tap to the hold to an ego-based refusal to lose to a 15-year-old child who is half my weight. I wholeheartedly refute these claims, and I would note that the submission would not have occurred if I had chosen to use my strength advantage against her and also figured out how to get my feet back under me to do so.

I would like to offer my unequivocal apologies to those I have hurt with my mistake, most notably the gentleman in the neighboring group trying his first class, and the students asked to assist with cleaning his vomit. I look forward to a full recovery and a return to the mats as soon as my bones decide to stop taking extreme and unnecessary liberties with their range of motion.

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