By Apologies if this is hard to follow, my brain is racing at 6.348296 times its normal processing capabilities and it’s all feeling a bit frantic, but I need your help! Like any self respecting martial artist, I subsist on a metaphorical diet of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and combat sports podcasts, and a literal diet of coconut water, supplements and an all red-meat diet served raw without seasoning. This has always served me well, and I saw some truly epic advances in my life. I complete more work in the three hours a day I spend on the toilet than you complete in a week.
I find myself growing increasingly concerned at the levels of power I have attained after starting Alpha Brain last week, however. The other day I moved a car with the power of my thoughts. I didn’t used to be able to do that, and I’m worried about how this all ends. I’d love to think the solution is just to stop taking them, but also, is it so wrong for one man to have all this power? If someone is going to benefit from the awe-inspiring capabilities Alpha Brain unlocks, why not me? Someone has to be the most powerful person on earth. I’m a good man. I can do GREAT things.
Are you saying that I wouldn’t? Are you trying to STOP me?!?! Do you really think that’s wise? Do you really think yourself capable? Oh, don’t go closing the tab now. I know what you’ve done. I know what you’ve thought. MY VENGEANCE WILL NOT ABATE! YOUR ONLY HOPE IS MY MERCY!
Repent.
REPENT.
REPENT.
REPENT.
REPENT.
REPENT.
