Report: Funniest Possible Resolution Tantalizingly Close

You’re still playing checkers, and Colby? He just ate the pieces. Please call a doctor.


Some encouraging reporting out of Miami indicates that we are extremely close to seeing the Masvidal-Covington beef, a tiresome spat that initially seemed fated to be entirely insufferable and unenjoyable from the first to the last, resolving in the absolute funniest possible way. With the recent decision by Covington to press charges against Masvidal after the latter jumped him outside a Miami restaurant, all that’s left is for the charges to be dropped with no further action for the entire situation to reach its comical apex.

Masvidal got the comedy started by first offering an interview discussing how badly he would kick Covington’s ass immediately following his own domination by the racist troll. He added the cherry on top with his assault which drew a quote from an observer that Masvidal, who brags about his knockout power, landed three to four punches to Covington’s undefended face with the primary takeaway that it didn’t seem to phase Covington at all.

Covington, never one to misunderstand how to play the heel, added his own comedy by pressing charges, immediately finding a way to somehow be held in even lower esteem by his peers and fans of the sport. While it is unclear whether charges will ultimately be dropped as of publication of this story, everyone agrees that it would be the perfect finale, with Covington managing to see no reward and maximum embarrassment for his decisions.

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