Dana White Fan Not Joking

Your post got him so angry he spilled his drink onto his $60 T-shirt.

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A man responding to comments on an Instagram post about fighter pay has declared himself a fan of Dana White, and is neither joking nor alone in his fandom. To the bafflement of most who encounter him, Tom Crane, a 34-year-old “lifelong fan” of the UFC president holds a true and unadulterated love for the fight promoter which far outstrips their feelings toward any mixed martial artist past or present. Crane, who works an office job, spends upwards of two hours of work time and three hours of after-work recreation each day arguing on social media and website comment sections with anyone who speaks ill of the bald-headed bloviator.

“DO YOU EVEN REALIZE THEIR [sic] WOULDNT [sic] BE A UFC WITHOUT DANA WHITE,” Crane responded on a post covering White criticizing the heart of a fighter while also noting White’s lack of experience with enduring the rigors of competing in a professional cage fight. “HE SINGLE HANDILLY [sic] SAVED THE SPORT SO MAYBE DO YOUR RESEARCH BEFORE YOU KEEP TALKING THIS BULLSHIT!”

While it has been speculated the man is merely joking and taking his bit a tad too far, sources confirm he holds a genuine adoration for White’s non-PC attitude, shrewd ability to keep as much money away from the fighters as possible and retaliating against anyone who has a problem with that.

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