Exclusive reporting by our news team has discovered that world-famous mixed martial arts site MixedMartialArtish.com has failed to publish an article in its usual timeframe today, and that the culprit was none other than Arsenal Football Club, of London. Faced with the prospect of continuing to think about which topic they wanted to cover, and with one proposal originally deemed to require an unacceptably high work load of a few minutes of Photoshop, journalists within the organization instead made the decision to have a Wonka Bar Twix edible and watch the opening match of the 2022-2023 Premier League Season, which Arsenal won 2-0 on the road to Crystal Palace. The reporting also indicates that nobody has noticed the lack of a new post, and the site will likely get away with it if they just play it real cool.
Report: Mixed Martial Arts Blog Shirks Sacred Posting Responsibility to Watch Arsenal
Nobody tell the boss. Be cool.