Noting that they all loved him and cared about him very much, the friends and family of Ben Dawson held an intervention for Dawson after learning he had successfully picked all seven fights on the recent UFC 278 prelims. Having had the issue brought to their attention when Dawson shared a picture of the winning betting slip on social media, the group immediately arranged to have the important talk.
“I mean, come on, Ben,” said Dawson’s best friend Chad. “Half of these guys don’t even have Wikipedia pages! What kind of sick tape eating have you gotten into to go seven-for-seven? You know you can talk to us.”
The family’s worst fears were confirmed after a preliminary search of Dawson’s browser history, consisting entirely of streams of local fight organizations around the world, MMA roundup videos and episodes of the Ultimate Fighter.