Apparently It’s NOT Normal for a 42-Year-Old to Look Like This

While Alistair Overeem’s return to kickboxing got off to a strong start with a rubber-match victory over three-time foe Badr Hari, the win has now been stripped from him as the Dutch fighter has somehow wound up on the wrong side of a drug test. Overeem, whose physique for the bout could best be described as “what if an anthropomorphized muscle got really into The Joe Rogan Experience” failed a drug test for the event and has received a one year suspension and an updated no-contest result for the bout. Although this is not the first time Overeem has run afoul of drug speculation, prior instances were fully and comprehensively justified by the reasonable explanation of eating horses and accidentally getting the special “Oops! All Testosterone!” Tylenol.