By Look, everyone, just be cool. Yes, Dana White recently confirmed that a bout between Dustin Poirier and Charles Oliveira is in the works for the UFC Lightweight Title at UFC 269. Yes, this is rad as hell for so many reasons. Yes, it promises to be a fight between the two best Lightweights on the planet, who are also physically incapable of combining to make a boring fight. Yes, it promises us months of buildup filled with an almost unfathomable level of charming respect for the opponent instead of grade school taunting. Yes, this is dope as fuck.
And that’s why we are here today to ask everybody to just be chill about this. We are MMA fans. We do not get these kind of fights, dammit. We do not deserve these kind of fights, if we are being totally honest with ourselves. In any just world, we will not receive this fight. In any just world, Oliveira will get an injury requiring a two-week delay of the fight, and Conor McGregor will scoot out to the cage at UFC 269 in a boot, ready to take on The Diamond for the interim title.
So let’s all agree we are not going to tempt the fates, who love nothing more than raining down disappointment and despair upon the heads of MMA fans. Let us do nothing that might draw their anger or even their interest. No talking our friends’ ears off about how amazing this is going to be. No flooding social media with our excitement about this fight that is definitely going to happen. And positively no articles… completely gushing… about how incredible… unmissable… and fantastic this will be…
Fuck.
