Don’t believe us? Bet you wouldn’t say that on the mats.
Author: Mixed Martial Artish Staff
Harrison’s flow rolling rampage lasted for all three rounds of the class’s live rolling, yielding two bloody noses, a dislocated finger and one hyperextended knee.
The news, which the former champion has reiterated several times in the intervening months, was said to have caught the promoter completely off guard.
“I’m just not a quitter, you know? On the mats, in the streets, I’m just not that guy.”
“Here, I’ll show you, see how tight it goes when I put my arm across like this, see how hard it is for me to talk. Great, great now just squeeze your legs and pull on my head.”
“While we don’t yet know who Conor will be facing for this prestigious belt, we have full faith that he will find a way to do more of his schtick that you goofs can’t get enough of.”
“See, look at this weak shit,” said Martin, who last month cried because he got a splinter in his thumb, as a fighter was defeated by a body kick and the subsequent 17 punches to the head and neck.
“Oh, to be a fly on the wall. Imagine how the sport could have looked. Passing guards. Actively taking an opponent to the ground and landing on top. Strangulations!”
UFC Streamer: “Dana White Is So Big and So Strong, and I Regret Ever Challenging His Mighty Presence”
“I said you keep an eye on this dummy. If he puts one pixel out of line, he’ll regret it. We’ve got his phones tapped. We’ve got his internet watched. We’ve got his parents kidnapped. Try me.”
Reports confirm that everyone has recently earned a new rank, and that your coach could not be prouder of them and the way they’ve been performing at the gym recently.